Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Weaning: Episode 3

~OK, we are through the 'infamous' 3rd night and there were no miracles my friends. All those people who told me "just get thru 3 days and you'll be fine" are now on my sh-t list...just kidding, but still.

~Mom came over to provide a support system for me. Thank goodness too because I just may have caved last night if she wasn't there. He was SOOOO tired when I got home from work and ended up taking a super late nap - I tried to prevent it, but failed...he woke around 7pm and so clearly there was no way he was going to bed around 8:30pm.

~Finally @ 9:30pm I put him in the crib and the crying saga began. I started @ 8 minute intervals, increased to 15 repeatedly rubbing his back to encourage him to fall asleep. I finally gave up the back rubbing because it was SO not working and I decided to let him cry 'til 11pm and then try to rub his back again to get him to sleep hoping he would be worn out by then. That's what ended up happening. And oh-so-lucky me...he woke up only 1.5 hrs later @ 12:30am.

~After checking on him @ 12:30am, I decided to just let him go for 30 or more minutes at a time. He HAS to tire himself out @ some point, right? Well, I apparently have the world's MOST stubborn child...he lasted until 3:30am and remained STANDING UP in his crib the majority of the time. In fact, he even fell asleep standing up while leaning on the crib...nice huh?

~Since a little humor is always helpful in this sort of situation. Mom and I were watching him on the monitor and he was kneeling in the crib, holding on to the railings and was clearly nodding off but furiously fighting it. He looked like a bobble-head doll. We could only see the back of him, but it was freakin' hilarious. I felt bad for him @ the same time though. :(

~After falling asleep @ 3:30am, he woke @ 5:30am!!! WTH? So he slept a grand total of 3.5 hours last night, just like me. Awesome!! I took him out of the crib @ 5:30am and we laid on the couch together until 6:30am when I had to get ready for work. He pretty much slept that hour too...so wow 4.5 hrs total. He will probably be TONS of fun today for the sitter. I wish I was with him instead.

~So, yes I really wanted to cave and just take him back to my bed. Even more so because my left boob feels like it is going to explode resulting in a breastmilk shower for anyone standing within 10 feet of me. I have 'expressed' some to relieve some of the pain/pressure, but it seems to be filling back up pretty darn quickly. Thankfully, the right boob is playing along nicely and cooperating with my plan.

~My plan for tonight is to put him in the crib @ 9pm, or earlier if he appears tired and just leave him alone with larger time intervals....say 45-60 minutes. Last night, after about 45 minutes alone, he finally started to poop out...so even though it feels awful, I think I'll let him go and hopefully he'll give up sooner and just freakin' fall asleep. Whenever I would go in and check on him, it only seemed to upset him more when I would leave, whereas leaving him along for longer periods of time gave him the opportunity to calm himself more (yay). It was so frustrating watching him on the monitor just stand at the crib railing when if he just would have laid down, he would have zonked out in 5 seconds flat. He was (is) sooooo tired.

~As for progress, there was definitely less crying last night, even though there was MUCH less sleeping.

~And as for my feelings, well, I'm thinking E and I just need to hop the next plane to Europe where its completely 'normal' and accepted to nurse your child until they are 3-4-5 years old. Clearly I don't want to nurse that long, but this process totally sucks and I need results dammit. I'm feeling very sad and my sadness increases as bedtime nears, I also feel like it will never work and that he may never get the hang of this sleeping thing, I mean if he only knew how AWESOME sleep is. I don't know if I can do this for another 4-5 nights. When did I become such a mush? Oh yeah, the day E was born probably.

~It will be increasingly difficult if O comes back and sleeps @ the house too. Just thinking about that stresses me out. My mom's husband comes home from out-of-town tomorrow and O will likely not want to stay there at that point, even though he still could, he may feel uncomfortable. He's weird like that.

~So I'm feeling a little (alot) blue today. I hate this process. All I want to do is pick E up and cuddle him. I'm tired of hearing how others have had quick success with this process. I'm feeling like a bad mom and a failure. What am I doing wrong? I mean, it's not that complicated so really what's going on? I've followed the 'rules' (or whatever you want to call them) to a "t"...so I guess I have a slow learner on my hands, at least with regards to sleep...

~I did get a bunch of hugs and kisses before I left for work, so that was awesome.

24 comments:

Unknown said...

You poor thing! And the poor baby!

Anonymous said...

Ignore everyone's advice and do what works for you. I tried weaning my son into his own crib, and I was a zombie for months. When I accepted he would sleep with us, and let him, he only did that for a couple more months. You just need to buy a bigger bed. The nursing thing I don't know about. He weaned himself early. Good luck! Stay strong!
Tisha

WarriorHeartGypsySoul said...

Don't give up, you've made it this far already. He's a smart kid, so he's going to try a few more tactics to get you to cave. When you don't, he'll be ok!!

Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

For the boob, I've heard the cabbage thing really works; maybe give that a try.

And, if he was out that early, he might need an earlier bed time; an over tired baby is hard to get to sleep. Just a suggestion...I'm only trying to help, so feel free to tell me to shut up.

We try to get Izzy down by 7:30pm and I have to wake her around 6:30.

Anonymous said...

dont give up and ur definitely not a failure. This task is (obviously) not easy and u've made steady progress. KEEP GOING!!! You can do it!!!

But if all else fails, then wats the problem with E sleeping with u?? Well maybe thts just me since my parents didnt bother with a crib but DONT GIVE UP!!!!

*krystyn* said...

GastonStudio-thank you!

Tisha-I'm trying to do that. I know all children are different. Just my luck I have one who would much rather sleep with me and have booby 'til he is 90 I guess. I can't afford a bigger bed. Boo!

Keke-Thank you. Gonna stick with it even tho it sucks.

Krystyn-E has always gone to bed around 8-8:30pm but since he napped so late due to NO sleep the night prior, he wasn't ready for bed 'til 9:30ish. It's hard to gage, but he's usually consistent around the 8:30 timeframe. I WISH he would be ready @ 7:30pm, but that has NEVER happened. Thank you. I appreciate the suggestions. I have heard about the cabbage too...I guess I'll have to swing by the grocery store today.

Daniel-I don't mind E sleeping with me, but it's too difficult to wean him while sleeping in the same bed. Also, I need to get him to sleep thru the night. I've been sleep-deprived for too long.

Bored Housewife said...

You are neither a bad mom or a failure. He's just pissed off. Think about how you would feel if someone took away Dr. Pepper. He just doesn't know how to cope yet, and crying is the only language he has. Stick with it. If O doesn't like it, he can sleep in the car. Remember, no child ever cried itself to death!

Amy said...

I can't even imagine how grouchy you must be going to work on hardly any sleep. I would be horribly pissy. Good luck and I hope he caves soon, for your sake.

Fidgeting Gidget said...

I'm not a mom, so I don't have any advice for you, but I can only imagine that you're tired and frustrated. Just remember the hugs and kisses, and hopefully it'll work itelf out soon! Hang in there, you're a tough cookie!

Anonymous said...

Don't think of yourself as a failure. Instead, think that all those babies who were successfully weaned in 3 days just didn't love their mommy as much as E loves you. He just can't stand to be away from you!

emilysuze said...

You rock as a mom--you have to be an awesome mom to have raised such a fiercely stubborn and smart little boy, right? :)

Good luck and I love the one comment that someone left about O sleeping in the car. Might be just the place for him since this is soooo hard on him. {insert eye rolling here}

Linda said...

When I weaned my boy, I went on a 3 day mini-vacation with some friends and left him with my husband. It didn't cost much and it made the process a lot easier for obvious reasons. Maybe Mom would love to keep E for a few days?

Valerie said...

I have something for you on my blog. Maybe that will bring you a smile this afternoon!

Hope you're not too terribly tired!

Bored Housewife said...

Left you a little something at boredhousewifesyndrome.blogspot.com...

Anna Kauz said...

You are doing so well!! It took us about a week to get Charlotte to sleep through the night, so don't loose hope (granted we were very lucky that she never wanted to, and won't sleep with us). We finally had to wait about an hour, and usually by then she had settled down and knew we wouldn't come back in, because every time we did, she got stubborner and "awake" so you might be having the same thing happen, and its so hard to do in the middle of the night though! I'm so sorry he's being so stubborn and fighting it so bad!!

Oh and I hear cabbage leaves work with the boobs!

philly5113 said...

Stay strong, Dear. I know that is easier said than done but you know what, every child is different so all of the rules and the suggestions are just suggestions. Follow your gut and keep you goal in sight. You'll both arrive at the same place soon and will be happier for it!
You are in my prayers and my best wishes to both of you.
Give him an extra hug tonight.

*krystyn* said...

Thank you so much for the wonderful words of wisdom and encouragement. They are SO needed and very much appreciated.

We are currently 45 minutes into crying. I sure hope he wears himself out soon. :(

Optimistic Pessimist said...

You're doing a great job. Hang in there, you can do it!

Brandi said...

I have no advice, as I've never been through this process! But just wanted to drop in an wish you lots of luck! I can only imagine how frustrating this is for both of you. :( I hope E gets the hang of it soon & your efforts translate to a complete success!

Absolute Truth said...

My boyfriend told me to read your blog because we are about to have our first child. You are giving me a to do and not to do list in mind. You did a great job and I salute you but that was a stubbon baby and I fear mine may be the same.

Beatriz said...

Hope last night was a little better. Just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the "Lovely Blog Award", I think you have some of the coolest gadgets I've found yet for blogs. :D Have a good day!

Denise R. said...

KEEP HOPE ALIVE!!!!

Anonymous said...

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Chele76 said...

hon - I want to make sure I've got thos right. You're weaning him off the boob AND into the crib at the same time? Girl You are doing AWESOME! That is a LOT to take on at once... most of my friends have done one at a time. Just keep in mind what you've accomplished with the boob thus far.... the bed is the harder part...and you WILL get there! Youare doing AWESOME!!!!