~unprofessionalism overflow~

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~Password still didn't work this morning

~Packed up the PC and it's ready to go (psycho mgr will be relieved, I'm sure)

~Agreement was to work THRU today, so I better get paid for it

~I'm truly shocked by the unprofessionalism

~I've never been treated like this

~Hoping the Karma Gods come thru for me on this one...

~annoyed~

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Yes, I've been miserable lately, but I think anyone would be annoyed by the following...

~the psycho beyotch of a manager has called me 3 times in 2 weeks, twice in the past 3 days.

~she hasn't even called me that many times since being the manager (about 6 months)

~today she has the nerve to ask me if there is anything I need to hand off to her or have I been working with the recruiters to do that?!?!
My answer: Duh!! Why in the hell would I not work w/the recruiters (as I've always done) simply to avoid communicating with her?

~then, the icing on the cake...she asks me if I'll be able to get the PC packed up and dropped off to be shipped out tomorrow or Saturday for Monday delivery.
My answer: I coldly respond that I'm not sure if I can get there Friday or not unless I sign off at 4pm because I have somewhere to be Friday evening. I surely would not be taking time on MY Saturday to do it either.

~Then she rudely tells me that 1/2 day Fridays start tomorrow so I don't need to work past 1pm. On one hand, that is great, on the other, not so much ($$$).

What irks me though is that she is so effin ridiculous. There is no way I would want to keep this piece o'crap computer anyway. It's uber slow and ancient. I have my OWN computer, I don't need this one and I don't appreciate being treated like a criminal.

Speaking of criminals...I'm not the one with 2 DUIs on my record...something I just happened to find out recently!!!!

~Oh and did I mention that all of a sudden my password is no longer working??? Nice.

~gradual~

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I'm slowly getting better.

There is no more puking - thank goodness for that.

I do have a slightly sore throat though.

I did absolutely nothing yesterday (except work)...so I guess I mean I didn't shower, cook, clean or anything else. It was wonderful actually. All I did was eat & drink the approved items and lay in bed watching TV. I need MORE days like that.

Today I had to get up and shower asap. I had a scheduled interview on Tuesday, the day I was sick, so I had it rescheduled to this morning. It's at 9:30am.

I am then meeting my mom for lunch @ 1pm. Will probably only have soup, if that.

Then I have a 3pm phone interview today.

I also have to work at SB at 6:30pm tonight.

I feel sort of overwhelmed with so much to do after having nothing to do yesterday. I hope it doesn't backfire on me and make me feel worse tomorrow.

~taking a beating~

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Too much excitement here lately....

On Monday night I went to bed at 11pm and all was well.

At 11:15pm I was up and worshipping the porcelein god...all of a sudden....I do not know where this came from.

At 12:20am or so, it happened again.

At 1:30am or so, back to the bathroom for me again

This continued every hour ON THE HOUR until 6am.

I finally called the on-call doc who instructed me to come into the ER.

I spent 5 hours there yesterday, but miraculously was not dehydrated, but I sure was DYING for some water. I was sooooo thirsty.

Anyway, I received an anti-nausea pill and then finally was able to take in some liquids. After holding them down for 2 hours, I was released.

They never really diagnosed me there, but when I called my doctor at 4pm yesterday afternoon complaining of constant achy legs, they told me that I've probably got the Flu! Argh!

I got my Flu shot about 10 days ago. Apparently they do not offer protection until 4-6 wks afterwards. I did not know that. :-(

I was in bed just about the entire afternoon and fell asleep for the night at 8pm!!! Wow -that's early for me. I slept straight thru 'til 7am today.

I'm working this morning, but certainly not feeling 100%. Thankfully I got people to cover my shifts @ SB last night and tonight. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

~if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all~

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I haven't posted in a while, hence the title...I'm sure everyone is sick of reading my negative and crappy-life posts and so I have not posted lately to spare you from reading a bunch of nothing. Basically, I have nothing 'good' to report right now so it's best if I don't say (or post) anything at all. Since all this junk is dominating my life, I'm surrounded by comments such as 'it'll get better' or 'you'll be fine' or 'other people have it worse than you' or 'everything happens for a reason' etc. Thanks to my handy-dandy Master's Counseling classes, have learned that those are all EMPTY responses that ultimately INVALIDATE a person's feelings and are not helpful in making someone feel better and so I will refrain from posting any job or life news at this time...

And so, in honor of the above paragraph...here are '50' questions that I swiped from Dawn's blog...except, there aren't really 50 because some people deleted some along the way...

1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
House payment - it's the biggest, it hurts the most.

2. Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?
Ha - can't remember that.

4. If you could go back and change one thing what would it be ?
Oh. boy. (I'm keeping this response as it's what Dawn used and if I really answered this question, this would be the World's Longest Blog Post EVER!)

5. Name of your first grade teacher?
Cannot remember...WAY TOO LONG AGO.

8. How many colleges have you attended? 4

9. Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now?
Because it was time for bed and I put on my pajamas...too bad I cannot sleep and have to be up in 3.5 hrs to go to work.

11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would it be?
A quiet & remote beach. I'd take Milo & Hula ONLY!

12. First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
"Oh crap, it's 3:45am already?"

13. Last thought before going to sleep last night?
"it's 8:30pm and I must go to bed NOW because I have to be up at 3:45am"

14. Do you miss being a child?
Oh do I ever!!! My childhood was WAY better than my adult life has been.

16. What errand/chore do you despise?
errand: grocery shopping. chore: cleaning the bathrooms

17. If you didn't have to work, would you volunteer?
if i could find the right volunteer position. or I would work for fun. (keeping Dawn's answer here too).

18. Get up early or sleep in?
depends on day of the week

19. What is your favorite cartoon character?
I don't think I have one anymore.

20. Favorite thing to do at night with a girl/guy?
depends on who the guy is - LOL

21. Have you found real love yet? pleading the 5th

22. When did you first start feeling old? 2 yrs ago

25. What do you get every time you go into Wal-Mart?
Groceries!

26. Beach or lake?
Beach

27. Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual?
In terms of what it was intended to be, probably so. Rare is the couple that truly works and works to hang on to a struggling marriage...it's so easy to 'just get out' nowadays.

28. Do you own property?
I wouldn't say 'own', but I do have a mortgage and my house sits on land, so I think technically the answer would be 'yes' - but since I've only made 9 payments, I probably only own 1-2 blades of grass.

29. Favorite Guilty pleasure?
Travel....just about anywhere.

30. Favorite movie you wouldn't want anyone to find out about?
no idea

31. What's your drink?
Diet Sunkist

34. Who from high school would you like to run in to?
No one

38. Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back?
Giving a 2nd chance to people that I shouldn't have.

40. What famous person would you like to have dinner with?
how long have you been reading this blog? you should know the answer to this is: Robin Williams

41. Indoors or Outdoors?
Indoors if it's cold outside. Outside if it's 75 or higher.

42. Have you ever crashed your vehicle?
I've been in my share of car accidents

44. Last book you read?
Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

46. Strangest place you have ever brushed your teeth?
~I dunno~

48. Do you go to church?
Not very often these days

49. At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or a new relationship? Ha...great timing...a new career would be nice!

50. How old are you...36

~making room for baby~

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~We picked up the baby furniture on Friday and started assembling the crib last night.

~I think I've been in denial about the amount of space in the room, but I've finally come to terms with the fact that I'm going to have to sell my beloved chair & a half (pictured here).

~I may need a chair in there, but this one is just too big. :-(

~O will move the dresser in (from the garage) today while I'm working @ SB so I've started washing baby clothes so that I can put them away in the dresser.

~Slowly but surely, things are coming together in there.

~life continues to suck~

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~interview lady finally called this morning @ 9:40am

~she didn't sound 'under the weather'

~they are moving forward with an 'internal' person

~eventually they'll build to 4 recruiters (2 more to fill)

~so she wants to stay in touch and possibly bring me in for one of the other positions

~that could be months down the road

~certainly doesn't help me out right now

~she asked me "how does that sound to you?"

~how do I answer that? "it sounds like crap to me, I need a job now, not 4 months down the road"

~I didn't say that, although I wanted to.

~Now try and tell me that being PREGNANT had NOTHING to do with this decision...I think NOT!!! I'm not an idiot!! (that's what I get for being honest and forthright)

~Looks like I'll be working 40 hrs/wk at Starbucks come 12/3...yep, cuz that's why I went to college.

~public service announcement~

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Found these at Walgreen's last night!! We don't have to wait 'til Easter anymore...hooray!! I know Emily will be happy to hear this news.

~totally random~

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Here's a totally random post and my attempt at being 'positive' when in reality I feel like complete crap and would like to just disappear forever!!

~I could eat toaster waffles everyday...I was reminded how good they are when I had them for breakfast today.

~I applied for a job today with Nielson Media...lots of great benefits, too much driving but they provide a company car, they want someone bilingual, could be interesting...we'll see what happens.

~My dad is coming in town today to have lunch and take me to Babies R Us. :-)

~Hands down....this has been the crappiest year of my life...I sure hope 2008 is better. (ok, so that wasn't too positive)

~I do not have to work at SB tonight...finally can watch Grey's LIVE instead of via DVR.

~It's really something when people know you are leaving a job, they start being even more rude to you than they originally were. WTF?

~I feel a strong urge to send a scathing email to a couple people in a couple wks...we'll see. I feel the need to speak my mind in this situation.

~Project Runway debuted last night - wahoo - I stayed up 'til 1am so I could watch it...looks like another great season in store.

~I'm still waiting to hear from the lady regarding rescheduling the interview that was supposed to happen yesterday...getting quite discouraged at this point.

~This week is dragging by.

~A friend of mine is trying to get me free diapers and formula via her mom, who is an OB...that would be SO awesome. I don't want to use formula, but if I'm not working @ home, it'll be difficult to do 100% boob juice.

~interview update~

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~I finally received an email from the lady @ 7pm last night (I was at SB). She was out sick and said it was likely she would be out Wed too.

~We are trying to reschedule for Friday.

~I am waiting to hear back from her.

~ball of emotions~

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That's me today -a ball of emotions...I can't even decide WHICH emotion either. Warning: this posted ended up being quite whiney....(I'm blaming it on hormones).

We had Session #2 of the Childbirth class last night. The entire 2 hours was spent reviewing the vaginal birth and watching 2 videos: one on the birth and the other on comfort positions during labor. If I wasn't dreading the pain before, I certainly am now. The only funny part was that during the Transition stage of labor (3rd stage), our book says "mother may experience extreme love & hate emotions towards father" - Ha!! I'm sure I'll be cussing O out during the entire stage (if not longer). Did you know that the average labor lasts 17 hours?

Today I had a doc appt...I had the glucose/gestational diabetes test. This involves consuming a bottle of orange syrup-like liquid and then waiting 1 hour for them to take my blood. Here's hoping it comes back OK, otherwise I will have to go back for the 3 hour version of this test. Just the thought of that depressed me.

I made my next appointment. I have to go every 2 wks now. This sort of depressed me too. I wouldn't mind if I was still going to be working from home, or at least working. Going there every 2 wks is going to be a huge inconvenience if I'm working elsewhere...lost hours, lost wages, mileage, etc.

I am (supposed) to have that interview tomorrow morning at 10am. When I spoke w/the lady last Thursday, she said she would follow up by sending me an email with the interview location. I have not rec'd the email yet. There are 2 offices in the particular town she mentioned. I decided to call there today to find out which location. I was able to leave her a voicemail and asked her to confirm the location for me. This was 3 hrs ago and I have not heard back. What if she doesn't call? Do I just show up? I feel like I've been left hanging. Again, this makes me feel really depressed. What if it doesn't pan out?

I have not had any other promising job prospects. I've applied for a few more positions, but the job market here sucks...unless I want to be a Pastor...there are TONS of jobs for Pastors considering I live in the Bible Belt.

I'm also disappointed that I have to remain working at SB indefinitely. Bending over is quite uncomfortable now and being on my feet is no picnic either. I've been really short of breath lately too. I think today I came crashing down from that orange glucose loaded drink because I am sooooooo tired...I took 2 cat naps on the couch, but had to get up when the phone rang.

People have asked me if I can pick up more hours @ SB in the event I don't land another job...well, the answer is "yes" and "no". Everyone is part-time there except the manager. I normally get scheduled for about 25 hrs. I managed to pick up extra hours a couple wks ago, but there's no guarantee of that happening every week and even if it did, the money would not come close to making up for the difference I'm losing from the day job.

Did I mention what a loser I feel like now being in a position where I HAVE TO WORK at Starbucks? My self confidence is in the gutter. It's one thing WANTING TO work there vs. HAVING TO WORK THERE. Two months ago I thought I would be starting my Maternity Leave from there about now.

Considering how tired I am now really bums me out if I end up working outside the home over the next two months. I feel like that's going to be really difficult. I'm anticipating being quite miserable. Then there's the financial piece...I'll have to go buy more maternity clothes for work.

On a daily basis, I find myself worrying about daycare costs, something I wasn't going to need before.

It's pretty hard to be excited about what's to come considering all the crap going on right now. I feel like there is no relief in sight.

~great gift idea~

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Here's a great holiday, birthday or "just because" gift idea....create your OWN Starbuck's gift card. There are a bunch of designs and options to choose from - they are so cute and can be so fun to create.

It's as easy as 1-2-3!

Step 1: Go on-line to create your card
Step 2: Receive your newly created card in the mail
Step 3: Enjoy your favorite SB drink.

~baby shower~

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My baby shower was held Sunday @ 2pm. It was a lot of fun and loved especially by me because it was "short & sweet".

We played that fun game of tasting baby food and guessing the flavors...I LOVE BABY FOOD CORN!! Yum!! LOL!!

I got lots of good stuff, cute clothes, lots of socks, blankets, books and the bedding that I registered for.

Unfortunately, there is still a TON of stuff that I need!!

~good news & a brain teaser~

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I received a call yesterday for an interview. The job sounds promising and the salary range is in-line with what I make now, which surprised me since wages aren't too good in this area.

It was a very positive phone interview and I'm looking forward to meeting her on Wednesday. Now I just need to find some "interview-appropriate" clothing....

They sent me an on-line "test" and here are a couple of the questions that were included. I could not figure these two out for the life of me....give them a try and let me know what you come up with.

What should be the next number in the series?

60 30 20 15 12

Here's another...

23:3983 as 32: ______

~bad, bad, bad, bad news~

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Just when I thought things couldn't get worse...

I have been working "contract" for the past 3 years...it was only a matter of time.

I received THE call today.

My contract is ending on 11/30.

They "claim" they need to bring my position "in-house" to support more projects in 2008. Since it's Corporate America, it's probably a lie, but whatever.

I was initially only given 'til 11/21 (a whole 10 work days, how generous of them), but I asked for more time than that and got a whole extra week.

When my manager (whom I've NEVER met in person) said "you can stay on 'til Thanksgiving, that is, if you want to work". (Yeah, cuz I'm a closet-millionaire and really don't need this job) I said that I (really) need to work as long as possible (and asked to stay on 'til year end) as well as mentioned the small fact that I am 7 MONTHS PREGNANT. She didn't say a word, in one ear, out the other...no surprise to me really.

The response to my request to work til 12/31 was an emphatic "NO"...she didn't even hesitate.

I have always thought that the lowest, crappiest, sleeziest thing a company could do is to let someone go right before the holidays...I just don't get it. That goes beyond lack of compassion. It's a slap in the face. Companies want employees to be loyal and when they are, this is what they get in return. How nice!

I think I just lost my appetite for Thanksgiving and I don't foresee any Christmas shopping in my future...I think I'll just sleep through Dec 25th.

Did I mention that I'm the breadwinner in the house right now?

Going into an interview with my fat-ass stomach sticking out isn't going to go over too well either. As soon as they see me, they'll either bust a gut laughing or tell me that the interviewer has had a conflict come up and we'll have to reschedule.

I'm screwed!!

Oh and I've already heard "everything happens for a reason", "when one door closes, another opens", "God only gives us as much as we can handle" etc. etc. I don't really buy into any of these, nor are they helpful.

It's just me and my kleenex right now.

~i won!~

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Wow! I won a recent scrapbook layout contest that I entered...I'm surprised. I really didn't expect to win. What a pleasant surprise.

You can see it here.

~survey time~

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I swiped this survey from Dawn's blog...not much going on that's blogworthy so this came @ the perfect time...

Yourself: expanding with every minute

Your partner: 1 husband, he's at work.

Your hair: short, light brown with blonde highlights.

Your mother: is awesome. We look alike, we sound alike and we have fun when we are together.

Your father: is awesome too. Very caring and concerned - he rocks!

Your favorite item: If my cats cannot count as an "item", then I guess it would have to be my bed...I'm really sleepy right now and would like to be one with my bed.

Your dream last night: something to do with Starbuck's. Clearly, I've been working too many hours there this past week.

Your favorite drink: diet sunkist

Your dream car: my regular readers could probably answer this for me...but just in case, it's a Jeep Wrangler, Full Steel Doors, Soft Top, preferably navy blue with a black top...just like the one I used to have.

Dream home: on a beach, where I can literally walk out onto the beach or sit on my porch and see the beach, smell the ocean air and there's no risk of hurricanes or the house getting washed away.

The room you are in: my office/newly converted guest room.

Your Fear: the future

Where you want to be in 10 years: I can't think this far ahead right now, I am a planner, but I don't plan *that* far ahead.

Who you hung out with last night: a few fellow Starbuck's employees (at work)

You’re not: working tonight (miracle!)...I have to go to birthing class instead.

One of your wish list items: a nice wooden privacy fence would be nice.

The last thing you did: got my car washed on my lunch hour

You are wearing: blue jeans (that fall down when I walk because they are ELASTIC/STRETCH) , long sleeve white tee w/orange polo on top.

Your favorite weather: Late Spring and Early Fall

Your favorite book: "P.S. I love you by Cecelia Ahearn.

Your life: exhausting recently.

Your mood: suspicious

Your best friend: I think I have a few GOOD friends, but I don't think I have a real best friend anymore. *sigh*

What are you thinking about right now: too many things to list here.

Your car: 2005 Ford Escape

What are you doing at the moment: answering this survey

Relationship status: uh, married.

When is the last time you laughed: maybe at work yesterday, but I cannot recall exactly why.

Play along if you like...

~baby overload~

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It's been a baby-packed weekend...O installed some extra shelves in the closet which will help me keep things organized.
We picked up the paint today and O got 1/2 the room painted - we are painting the room a Sage green to coordinate w/the bedding I choose. The yellow is the old color that was on the walls.

This is the furniture that I picked out and purchased last week. Hopefully it comes in this week. I really want to have the dresser before my shower next Sunday so that I can put everything away...I'm all about organization. These are just pics of the crib and changing table, there's also a dresser.

~one word~

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Nothing to blog about...got this from Dawn.

The Air: cool
Favorite Fall Indulgence: sweaters
Out Your Window: grass
On Your Desk: phone
On Your Feet: socks
Favorite Fall Smell: bonfires
Temperature On Your Thermostat: 70
Your Shirt: yellow
Your Hair: disaster
Something You Want to Make Sure You Do this Fall: sleep
Where You Last Took a Fall (heh): church
Your Last Drink: agua
Your Last Meal: soup
You're Thinking About: crying
Hearing: blabber
Your Favorite Fall Color: orange
Your Take On Seasonal Novelty Flags (i.e. turkeys, pumpkins, scarecrows): blech
A New Fall Show You Like: Journeyman
Your Plans for the Evening: Work
Your Relationship With Pumpkins: yum