1) I miss blogging...like really, really miss it. All week long, random thoughts pop into my head and I think how wonderful they would be to add to my blog post...and then there is NO blog post. I'm lucky to sit down at the computer at all in the evening during the week, let alone actually have the time to craft a blog post. Now that I'm finally here, on a Saturday night, I can't remember all those wonderful thoughts that were floating in/out of my mind all week.
2) I'm in an "ugly stage"...has that ever happened to you? Seriously though, my face has been broken out for weeks now, so I can't blame that on Aunt Flo....and my hair, oh my hair, I've been struggling with it for what seems like forever...at least the entire summer. I've tried clarifying shampoos, moisturizing shampoos...you name it. It looks dry and like complete crap. Normally after a cut, I love my hair....that has not happened in ages. I really hope I'm nearing the end of this. I'm getting highlights on Friday, so maybe that is what my hair needs to perk back up.
3) Related to #2...all the clothes I wore for years working at a school and felt good in, all of sudden feel frumpy on me. It's not like everyone is dressing to the nines at my new job, but I'm struggling to feel like I fit in and I also feel like I can't be ME. Total drag.
4)Ethan is rocking the drum lessons. We are both so happy with our new choice for lessons. For 12 weeks he will have 1 private and 1 group lesson each week. The kids work together over the 12 weeks to put together a performance!! The theme this time around is 80's music - oh yeah!! So on repeat in my car (and everywhere) will be: "Billie Jean" by MJ, "Crazy Train" by Ozzy Osbourne, "The Final Countdown" by Europe and (my least favorite) "Sweet Child O'Mine by Guns N Roses. It's going to be a fun ride.
5) On the topic of music, Maroon 5 is in concert here on Sep 14 and Ethan has been asking to go since March, when it was first announced. It's mid-week, so it will be just him and I. I haven't told him we're going yet, but I can't wait to tell him!!
6) This made me laugh. It looks just like Milo and he was all doped upon cat nip the other day.
7) Not to finish in a Debbie downer kind of way but I think for my own sake I need to write about this...I've been super struggling with this new job and the changes to our daily life..."our" meaning me and Ethan since Oscar is not in town during the week and therefore is of NO help when it comes to pick up and such. While I should feel immensely happy about my new job and all it brings, I'm just not feeling it. Now, don't get me wrong there are many good things about it and I was quite miserable at the school, but lately I'm finding myself second guessing this decision. What? Why am I doing this? It's making me very sad having to deal with these feelings. Ultimately the piece of this change that is causing me the most heartache is the longer hours which delay me in picking up Ethan until almost 5:30pm most days. Super drag! So as I try to figure out if this was the right decision, I suppose it depends on the goal...for example, if my goal was to have a better paying job with opportunities for growth and advancement as well as a healthier retirement plan, then heck yeah, I made the right choice. But then if my goal were to spend as much time with Ethan as possible while he is still young, then nope, it definitely was the wrong decision. I knew the hours were longer going in so its not like I'm just realizing it now, but k guess being 7 weeks in tithe job and 3 weeks in to school, it's all sinking in and the shorter evenings with Ethan are breaking my heart. This morning he said to me that even though he gets out of school earlier this year, his school days are longer. What he meant but didn't say was that he is at school longer because I cannot get there until usually 5:30 to pick him up. And that is how my emotional train wreck of a Monday started. I have never looked so forward to time off as I do now and I absolutely cannot wait for Fall Break when I will take 3 days off and we will go to Myrtle Beach with my dad and then have an extra day at home together. All I can hope for is a more flexible schedule as time goes on, however being the "low person" on the totem pole doesn't bode well for me. *sigh*
1 comment:
Oh boy! I think you've written this post just for me.
I miss blogging too and actually pumped one out today - similar feelings as well.
Speaking from experience, this current job I'm in took me at least 6 months to find my groove. Every single day I questioned what I had done and considered it the biggest mistake ever made. I've been here 6 years now. Although I've had a recent rough few months, I'm glad I stuck it out. Yes I spend more time away from home, but with my ultimate financial goals in mind, I know I made the right decision. Although being away from Ethan is sure to be tough for you both, you'll both find your groove and when you get to spend time together, it will be that much more special.
Have a great time away in Myrtle Beach when the time arrives!
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