wishful thinking

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a short list of things i'm wishing for - while also NOT wanting to wish for, because i'm so tired of being let down...who knew being hopeful was such a detriment to one's happiness...this is where I think it pays off to be either a realist or a pessimist...why expect things to go well...because when you have expectations, things end up falling apart and going horribly...at least for me.

so from now on, i expect & hope for nothing and that way if/when things work out, i'll be pleasantly surprised.

And I know I said I am taking a guy's approach to dating, and that is still my plan, but I am also finding that most (almost all) guys on the stupid dating apps are after only one thing...and that's not exactly the approach I want to take. Ugh!

So my wishes (not expectations) are:

-go on a date to Dollywood...I guess over the years I forgot how much MORE fun an amusement park is when you're there with someone you like/love...my ex didn't do rollercoasters and therefore never went to Dollywood with me. We did go to Cedar Point a few years ago, but he doesn't enjoy the rides & is impatient in lines, so let's just say it wasn't as fun as it could have been.

-having someone special in my life come Christmas - for many reasons, but one is that I'd really like to go to Biltmore Estate to see their Christmas lights. I've lived 1 hour away from Biltmore for 12 years and I've never been. They are supposed to be amazing.

-having someone to kiss on New Year's Eve.

-i'd really like to feel wanted/needed/valued by someone...i felt wanted by Mr. Not-So-Wonderful but maybe I'm an idiot & he had me fooled all along, but it sure felt good to get his "how was your day?" texts every day and chat on the phone every night. I miss that. 

-take a road trip to Nashville to check out the many wonderful restaurants as well as listen to live country music in as many of the bars as possible. Good times!