Monday, September 13, 2010
Awkward
One of the girls I'm studying with for Comps asked if she and the other gal could "look at" my study guide when they take their licensing test (November).
"look at" means "get a copy"...here's the thing, I feel taken advantage of if I just give them my study guide to make a copy...I mean, why should I pay $25 and they pay nothing.
Do I just keep "forgetting" to bring it to class? Or do I tell them they can each give me $10 or so foe their copy?
Also, I'm not "friends" with either of them so I feel less obligated to "give" them anything. I am certain we will have little to no contact after graduation.
Honestly I'd feel better just forgetting to bring it, but then they could always text me a reminder...ugh!!
What would you do???
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9 comments:
Tell em to go get their own, that is it copy-write and that you don't feel comfortable permitting them to copy it.
go so far as to tell them where you got it ...
I went through this for years at uni, Attending lectures and making study notes, and they sharing them to "friends" non of whom would every go out of their way for me.
So I say, keep it to yourself! If they really want it they will buy it... Hell they could pay 12.50 each and share it between themselves!
Tell em to go get their own, that is it copy-write and that you don't feel comfortable permitting them to copy it.
go so far as to tell them where you got it ...
I went through this for years at uni, Attending lectures and making study notes, and they sharing them to "friends" non of whom would every go out of their way for me.
So I say, keep it to yourself! If they really want it they will buy it... Hell they could pay 12.50 each and share it between themselves!
What would I do? I'd give it to them, not make them pay me a dime, and then bitch about it.
What should *you* do? Tell them you're willing to split the cost 3 ways and you'll fork it over on Monday when you're done using it. Or, if only one of them is willing to pay, go halfsies on it with her, then let her deal with whether to let the other girl have it for free.
And I'd totally text them about that offer, too. I'm a wuss.
I had someone who missed a lot of class ask to "borrow" my notes for an upcoming test. We decided to meet at Starbucks at a given time. Being so close to the test, I didn't want to lend them to her and not see them again before the test--I worked hard for this class, and frankly, she didn't. So I took my notes to a copier before our meeting time, paid the couple dollars it took to copy all the pages, then went to Starbucks and waited. The girl never showed.
The next day in class...I was given no apology or explanation. It was as if she'd totally forgotten. I was so offended (afterall, I was practically begged for these notes) that I tucked away the copy set and decided to not even give them to her when I saw her in class. Not only did I spend money so she can benefit on the hours I went to class and dutifully took notes for--she wasted my time by not meeting me, and not even giving me a call or text to say she wasn't going to make it. Disrespectful! I never hung out with her after that...
Honestly, it is not rude for you to ask for compensation. Tell them you thought about it and you had to pay quite a bit for this book. They can either compensate you for it, or you're going to sell it on half.com. Seriously--this is not being rude or snobby. These girls need to take a lesson from you on being a good student, a good friend, and show a little respect.
OR--tell them a relative recently phoned you and it was decided she/he could really use the book. You can't turn down a relative for acquaintances in class. Also note that this close relative is going to compensate you for the book, since this relative knows how expensive these books can be and she/he didn't want you to feel you were being taken advantage of. How could you say no to such a sweet relative?
I know this second one is a total lie and wouldn't allow them even the option to compensate you, but it sure as heck is better than them taking advantage of you. Check half.com to see what you could get for your book and possibly sell it there...
People like that totally get me PO. I had a girl want to borrow my notes for a class she rarely showed up for. A test was coming up, so I didn't want to just give her the notes, so I copied them before going to our designated meeting place. She never showed. Never phoned or texted, either. In class, she never apologized or offered an explanation. Waste of my time and money...
People like this don't have any respect. They don't even realize how disrespectful it is, probably because they've always had someone providing for them in some way.
It is not at all rude to ask for compensation--even close friends do it because one friend doesn't want to take advantage of the other.
Tell them you decided to sell it on half.com. If they want to compensate you for it, then they can have it. The book is too expensive to risk letting them take it and you not see it again (perhaps, they'll sell it?).
OR--tell them a close relative recently called you and you both decided that she/he could really use this book. You can't deny a relative over class acquaintances. Also throw in, that this relative didn't want to feel as if she/he was taking advantage of you, so they offered to compensate you for the book.
Then, check out half.com and see how much the book is going for--perhaps you could get some of that money back that way.
Tell them you're selling it used for $10. Simple as that.
Awkward is right. Tell, them that they have split the cost with you. If they didn't know you had it, they would have to buy it themselves or find someone else to mooch it off of.
if it was a friend/semi-decent acquaintance, i'd just loan it. but if it's just some random classmate that you're paired up with... yeah that'd be annoying. i know i sometimes borrowed stuff from friends in college that they paid for (and i guess i should have offered something now) but at least we were friends.
i'd try to muster up the courage to say sure if you want to split the cost. (i'm usually a wimp about these things)
Do what I've done before, say well I'm using it in my spare moments right now but when I'm done how about I give you a ring? Of course your spare moments can stretch until you're done studying with them.
I agree with you, you paid why don't they? Believe me sometimes you lend out books and never get them back. If you aren't taking your licensing exams then it's your study time, not theirs. I think it's legitimate if you don't lend it to them even for just a "day". Which by the way I'm sure these girls will say Oh just for a day please? But just a day always turns into weeks!
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