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*let me just start by saying this week has been amazingly disappointing & frustrating...or well, at least today anyway.

*in yesterday's mail O rec'd a lovely piece of paperwork from the ridiculously stupid State of AZ. This lovely piece of paper said he owes a buttload of $$$ in child support!?!?!?!

*let me just also say I WRITE THESE CHECKS (from his account) EVERY.SINGLE.EFFIN.FRIDAY and mail them so his stupid piece-of-complete-and-total-shit ex-wife gets her money...you know, she has to make those long road trips to prison to see her THIRD and current husband.

*there is NO WAY IN HELL he is behind in child support. it is ONE THING that he does well...he has always been financially responsible for his kids.

*so all night last night I had to hear all this boo-hooing about him potentially owing this money. worried before he knew it was fact. we had noticed the case number being ONE digit off from his actual case number, which was the first clue that this might be a mistake.

*he spoke with "trash" (ex-wife) last night where she reported not knowing ANYTHING about this (and I was born yesterday) but did admit that she put in a request that his payments come directly from his employer instead of from us.  That made my blood boil. 

*see, we know she rarely spends the money on her kids, but instead wastes it on herself...always has, but of course O still pays, he has to.

*and I forgot to mention that husband #2 provided her with yet ANOTHER child and oh yeah, she doesn't get ANY money from that loser. In fact, he was either deported back to Mexico or went back over there to avoid paying her...so in essence OUR household is paying for that kid too. Yay.

*now I have never really said a negative word about "trash" because honestly, she's never been rude or unkind to me. well, I apparently saved up all those negative words for yesterday and today. every.single.nasty.word. she is all of them. even that awful sounding "c"-word.

*on the phone last night, "trash" actually had the nerve to say to O "you don't know how much we struggle"....oh boy, when he told me that I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. seriously, she has a home (bigger than ours) WITH A POOL (hello!!) and she has a vehicle...so let's talk about who's struggling. O doesn't even have an effin car (embarrassing I know) of his own, thank goodness for his work vehicle. and we certainly don't have a pool. I want to get on the phone and chew her out so badly, it's nearly eating me up. the freakin' nerve she has.

*oh and then there's the part where she wins SHIT MOTHER OF A LIFETIME...how about setting a POSITIVE example for your daughters so maybe the 18yo wouldn't have gotten knocked up at 17yo JUST LIKE YOU. idiot. maybe that's why are you "struggling"...quit making babies. buy some condoms. get on the pill. whatever. there are TONS of options. I'm just biding my time til the younger one makes the same mistake.

*and then there's the great example you set by marrying a dude who is ALREADY in prison. Seriously!! I thought that only happened on TV...clearly her self-confidence & self-respect levels are sky-rocketing. Who does that? How exactly does one 'meet' someone who is in prison? Do they have "singles" nights for prisoners now?

*hopefully you get the picture. 

*O spoke with some fabulous State of AZ employees today and it was confirmed that there is some mix up because 'trash' moved the account from one county to another so everything he paid since being in TN was somehow not recorded...but she's been getting her money, so not sure how that works...clearly they have issues.

*besides all the frustration with 'trash'...this has brought back to the surface all my bazillion feelings of regret in marrying someone who already had kids...I always said I'd never do that and turns out that I caved completely. what a fucking idiot I am....and boy am I paying for it. with dollars and otherwise.