Friday, August 29, 2008

~self soothing 101~

~Guess what we are doing tonight and for the next 4-5 nights?

~Teaching Ethan to Self Soothe.

~What does that mean, you ask....

~Letting him cry for hours on end in his crib 'til he falls asleep ON HIS OWN...yep, not fun, but necessary because he (1) has not learned to fall asleep on his own (because I nurse him to sleep -oops, my fault) and (2) he wakes up crying throughout the night because I am not there.

~We saw the pediatrician this morning for immunizations. She says letting him cry is what needs to be done..sad but true. I'm not looking forward to the process, but I am looking forward to the end result - uninterrupted nights of sleep, E sleeping thru the night and longer naps too!! Did I mention that nursing will also be on the downswing? Yay!!

~Oscar's days on the airbed are over. Ethan's nights in bed w/me are over. Night feedings are over (yay for this one). It's back to the crib and I'll need to get some earplugs to maintain my sanity as I listen to my child cry his loudest as he waits for me to come to his rescue.

~Yes, I feel like a crappy mom for having committed these errors along the way. Now I must pay the price. The only consolation, I am not the only one who has done this. And, I actually had no idea that I wasn't supposed to nurse him to sleep.

~Positive news: E is officially crawling. Started 2 days ago. So cute!!


Anonymous said...

Oh, I suppose it's not errors. It just made you lose lots more sleep these past few months!

~**Dawn**~ said...

Awww, I love when they start to crawl!

Now, listen to me: you didn't make any errors. You did what worked for you & your child. Now you are at a point where that is no longer working for you & your child and you are taking the necessary steps toward a new bedtime ritual that will also be right for you & your child. No more, no less. Almost every baby I have ever known of has been nursed or bottlefed to sleep when they were very small. E is just moving on to the next stage.

krystyn said...

Thank you Dawn!!

We postponed night #1 of Self Soothing to tomorrow since he got shots today and is running a slight fever. Thought it would be too much for him. Tomorrow should be a better day, but I am TOTALLY distressed about this. I don't know how I'll be able to listen to him cry like he does for soooo long. Here's hopin' he's a fast learner.

~**Dawn**~ said...

You're very welcome. I hate when good parents feel like they are making errors when the evidence clearly illustrates otherwise. E is obviously well-loved, happy & thriving.

I do agree waiting til he's feeling better is a good plan. I know it will be hard to listen to him crying. We had a little girl in daycare who went through a stage where the *only* way she would go to sleep would be to cry herself to sleep. It was hard to let her do it but it was what she needed to do. Are you doing the "wait & let him cry for 15 minutes, go in to reassure him without picking him up, repeat" method? Or do you think that will just prolong it for him & you're just going to go cold turkey?

Stacy said...

Congrats little E. on the crawling dude! :)

I agree with Dawn~ You didn't make "errors". You love your baby & that is soooo obvious to all of us. Now you guys are just entering a new phase of life & it will all be okay. If it makes you feel better you should know that we went through this very thing with our first & I sat for HOURS outside her bedroom door & sobbed. My husband was ready to strangle me. Instead I would recoomend getting a good botttle of wine & a movie you know something to distract you :)

Heather said...

they are not errors! there are loving parents giving the babies what they need!

my almost 11 month old still wakes for a bottle once if not twice a night...and i give it to him even though the pediatrician has told me not to. i cannot listen to my baby cry. i never had this with catherine b/c she was sleeping through the night at 8 weeks but with him he does and well i wake up with him. and so does jason the nights i am at work.

krystyn said...

Dawn-the doc didn't say anything about a 15 minute method. She just said that he needs to cry it out and warned me that he could cry for hours. She said I could go in to make sure he isn't hurting himself but I cannot pick him up.

I think I'm just going to hole myself up in my BR (which is on the other side of the house) and bury my head in pillows. I'm thinking cold turkey is the way to go, I just want to be done.

Can we fast forward about 5 days?

Heather said...

and to answer your question about the back thing that you left on a comment of mine... i actually did have lower back pains after catherine for quite some time...they eventually went away and i never had them after having christian.