Sunday, December 30, 2007

~hindsight is 20/20~

Or in my case, hindsight is 20/10 which is technically better than perfect (how is that even possible?)...I did have an eye doc tell me I had 20/10 vision after my 2nd Lasik surgery...anyway...I digress....

This is my 118th post and my hindsight is that I wish I hadn't deleted my previous 2 blogs...Emily posted her 637th post tonight and it made me think I'd probably be somewhere around there by now had I stuck w/my 1st blog all along...not that it matters in the grand scheme of things, but it was just a thought. Not to mention how interesting it would be to go back and read those posts from 2005...eeks how things have changed!!

Today was rather calm...I was scheduled to work what will probably be my last shift at SB for a while (or forever). I was supposed to work 10am-3:30pm...I hadn't been there since last Sunday so I wasn't really 'into it' but I wasn't dreading it either. I asked a co-worker if he was interested in staying 'til 3:30pm for me and I would leave @ 1pm (when he would be leaving). He agreed. Yay! As I was being sent on a 10 minute break, the supervisor asked if I wanted to leave earlier, as in right then, it was 12noon....so I left. Woo - I worked a whole 2 hrs the whole week and I'll get a whoppin' $3 in tips tomorrow probably. LOL! That's funny!

I need to call the SBUX Benefits tomorrow to see if my leave has been 'approved'...you know I'm starting it a whole 15-20 days early...SBUX expects you to work up to 2 wks prior to delivery...hell no!! Not me!!! I don't see myself there come January 20th...not gonna happen. Anyway, the good news is that I'll still be able to get my FREE 1 lb of coffee every week while on maternity leave - that makes my mom, her husband and Oscar very happy...considering that I don't even drink it. Blech! Just give me my Iced Chai Lattes please. Mmmmm!

I've been officially craving ORANGES this past week. I consumed 4 in one day even. They are SO good. We bought 8 more today @ the grocery store and well, um I ate 2 of them already (they're small...really, they are!) This is probably my 1st real, true craving...strange I know...and it all started when I was at Bed, Bath & Beyond and asked a guy where the 'Plinks' are located...by the way, 'Plinks' are little citrus smelling things you put in the garbage disposal the clean and freshen it...fellow blogger Nichole shared this good bit of information on her blog recently (see Main Course) and I HAD to try them for myself.

Anyway, when I asked the guy where they were, he replied 'oh yeah, my wife eats oranges all the time, so she just puts the peel in the disposal and it does the same thing'....there was something magical in that sentence, because ever since then (12/23) I've been consuming oranges like there is NO tomorrow.

It won't be too soon for me to go back to work because I've been shopping WAY too much lately (see previous post)...today we ran up to the mall because I HAD to take part in the Bath & Body Works Perfect Pampering Sale...I mean...body cream for $3.00/tube...I couldn't pass it up and my justification was that I will likely not get out much during February and it would be a national tragedy if I ran out during that time...right? I think so. I avoided that possibility and am all stocked up (and then some) on body cream. Yay!

And finally...I've gradually drifted back into a little bit of scrapbooking...I decided to try to take part in Elise's Paper Adventure 08 Mini Album Project. You should too...it's not too late and I think it'll be fun. I seem to do better on 'prompted' projects as opposed to scrappin' on my own. I have my cover all ready to go and her first 'prompt' will be on Tuesday, January 1st.

Putting that mini-album together inspired me to start another...I finally decided to do one for our honeymoon to Hawaii. I had not been interested for SOME TIME because it was not the honeymoon I anticipated...heck marriage has not been what I anticipated either...but that's another story for another day (or not)...anyway...I'm pretty happy with how that's turning out, but like most projects, I'll likely never finish it. Oh well...I at least had good intentions at some point, right?

Saturday, December 29, 2007

~accomplished!!~

Well, if I can't feel accomplished in my professional life...at least I can feel accomplished at home...we got A TON of things done today....I took down the outdoor Christmas lights (which were just about the only Christmas decor we put up) and O hung up the extra shelf in the laundry room for me....I have never LOVED a shelf more...it's perfect...and a lot lower so I can actually reach it...COMFORTABLY. :-)

Here are a few pictures to explain the rest...


I'd been wanting a picture for above this table for quite a while..the wall is large and definitely NEEDED something. I saw this pic a while ago and finally picked it up today from BB&B with a coupon. Yay!! The miracle is that it actually got hung up on the same day it was purchased.
OK - sorry this picture is not so good, but it's of the 4x6 area rug I picked up at Target the other day. As with the above picture, I'd been wanting an area rug for under the coffee table for quite a while. I love it and the red matches the couch perfectly.

The sheer window scarf is another new addition...the rod had been there since we moved in and as with the rest of the room...desperately needed 'something'....I had looked for a scarf in a red tone previously but to no avail...I was so happy to find this today...finally!!!

On to Ethan's room...some of this has been done for a while, but I hadn't shared the pictures...so this is the lamp and picture frame that match the bedroom decor.

We finished the wall border tonight...we were 3 ft short and had to get another roll which we picked up about a week ago. I'm SO glad that the room is just about done. Also, note the matching nightlite and lightswitch. :-)

And here's a pic of the crib complete with mobile and all...my good friend Laura (from Michigan) purchased a BUNCH of the bedroom decor items for my shower and upon their arrival I put them together and in place.

We are only waiting on the changing table now...it's been quite a 'dilemma' getting the furniture. I purchased them through Sears -it was truly the only set I found that was reasonably priced and that I really liked...it's Bassett brand too which is known to be good quality. Anyway, the crib and dresser were both delayed in arriving based on the initial date Sears provided to me. After many calls to the baby dept manager, we obtained the 2 pieces about 2 wks later than anticipated.

The changing table was scheduled to come in on 12/13/07 and surprise, surprise - it didn't make it. I was back on the phone with the baby dept manager and it's now scheduled to arrive on 01/05/07...so we'll see. She has been very nice and as helpful as possible. In our last conversation I told her that I think I should be compensated for the hassle with all 3 pieces. She agreed and just credited my card $200!! Woohoo!!! Gotta love it!!

So, I have the last load of Ethan's clothes/blankets in the wash with Dreft right now and everything will be READY (except for me). I don't know if I'm truly 'nesting'...I'm always like this...wanting to get things ready WELL in advance...it's the planner in me.

In addition, I've been SO into home improvement/decor projects lately (for some ODD reason), that I now want to paint my kitchen. Before the house went on the market, the realtor had someone come in and paint THE WHOLE FREAKIN' HOUSE a yellowish color - every.single.room. They did a pretty crappy job too...everytime I go into the kitchen now, I see spots where there should have been 2 coats or they just completely missed....I mean, really...I don't think I should be able to tell that the kitchen was RED before...right?

Anyway, I want to paint it an orangish/terracota like color. I had been going for BLUE as the main color for a while but I'm totally changing that up now after purchasing 4 adorable wall plaques from BB&B the other day...they are of an Italian theme and I love them....we'll see what happens...I'd like to get the kitchen painted in the next couple weeks, but not sure if I can get O to buy into that...it's usually like pulling teeth to get him to do any sort of home improvement activity around here. (Don't get me started on that rant!)

It's truly a miracle that so much got done here today.

Friday, December 28, 2007

~lazy Friday~

~I'm having a VERY lazy day today....

~It's pouring rain outside, so being lazy is not entirely my fault. I cannot help it when it's so gloomy and rainy outside.

~I have spent the last 3 hrs curled up on the couch with my sweet Hula kitty.

~I should be doing some work, but it's not mandatory, it's more of an option for me - although I really need to.

~I'm just trying to enjoy this 'downtime'...I don't think I'll get much of it in the coming YEARS.

~I did bake 3 'spice cakes' this morning though...I guess I used up my energy on them.

~Back to the couch for me...goodbye.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

not the best day

~UT called
~They 'regret' to tell me that they choose another candidate
~They said I was "a very strong candidate"
~After the word 'regret' all I heard was 'blah blah blah'...you know...like Charlie Brown's mom.

Essentially, even though I have the contract job, I still need an job with benefits or I will either have to (1) pay through the nose to get Nat'l Guard benefits (thru O) or (2) continue to work at SB after Ethan arrives...neither scenario is all that appealing to me.


O's work benefits are pitiful and are ridiculously expensive, so that's not an option either.


If I stay at SB (which I REALLY REALLY REALLY don't want to do), my little man will essentially grow up without a mother because I will be working outside the house during the day AND at night. Oh joy!!


Oh yeah, if my maternity leave from SB starts on 1/1/08 then I'll have to be back there on 3/24/08 - which totally stinks.


I'm so sick of carrying the burden of responsibility. I wish I could just let go and embrace the gypsy life...it's really what's inside me anyway.


Ultimately, I'm still in the job market, but there's no sense in applying for anything 'til early Feb or later cuz there's certainly no hiding the PG now.

~relaxing~

~I've been able to work from home this week...no one is allowed in the building due to construction & security reasons. Yay for being back @ home.

~I am counting the hours 'til 5:30pm...why?....because I'm getting a 1 hr pregnancy massage and CANNOT WAIT!! Thanks again to my super, duper, rockin' awesome, generous friend Kelly!!!!

~Mom and I are going to see P.S. I Love You on Saturday...woohoo!!! I loved the book and Jeffrey Dean Morgan (Denny Duquette) is in the movie...it HAS to be good!!

~I'm officially in the process of starting maternity leave from SB. I had 4 shifts this week and managed to get 3 of them covered. Yay! I should only have to work on Sunday for 5 hours which shouldn't be too bad. I needed 240 hrs this quarter for benefits and as of my last paystub on Friday, I had 280....so no real 'need' to work the rest of the month...thank goodness. I've been enjoying my nights off.

~I haven't been in much of a scrapbooking mood lately - I wish I was, but I'm just not. I quit making those 'daily cards' - the last one I made was on 12/2.

~I was reading this blog and decided I HAD to check out the old newsprint style wrapping paper she mentioned....it is SO cute...I happily snagged the last 2 rolls @ my BB&B..for .99 each!!! I'm hoping it helps inspire me to scrapbook a little bit.

~I guess that's all to report...not too much excitement in my life right now...it's more of a waiting game at this point.

~can't sleep~

~It's 4:30am

~I can't sleep

~I want to sleep

~I can't take any sleeping meds either

~Hoping the 'glass o'milk' trick works...

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

~wah!~

~I don't want to go bed yet.

~I have nothing to do and there's nothing on TV (I don't feel like scrappin' or reading either).

~I guess I'm going to bed.

~a few pictures~

Here are a few pictures from the past couple days...and one of me and my big belly, per Janeen's request.... :-)
Taken on Sunday, Dec 23, 2007 @ 33 wks pg.

Me and Brinkley...my mom's new kitty.

Another pic of me and Brinkley...and the belly.


And some of the yummy cookies we baked.

Friday, December 21, 2007

~TGIF~

~SO glad it's Friday...but I do have to work at SB tomorrow morning...ugh.

~Dad is coming in town Saturday and we are taking him to dinner for his birthday which was 12/15.

~Forgot to mention that baby is head-down so that's a positive sign...he's getting ready and no breach baby for me. (I really don't want a C-section if I can help it).

~Here's hoping that I hear from UT today!!!!

Thursday, December 20, 2007

~ick~

~I'm home for a marathon 45 minutes then off to SB...yay me.

~Still no word from UT...getting antsy now!

~Went to OB today...they charge $25 to complete short-term disability & FMLA forms...what a crock!

~I gained 7 lbs since 11/30...that sucks!!!

~Still not in a Christmas mood...can I just sleep though it?

~Wow, what a negative post...sorry about that but that's pretty much how I've been feeling all day today....I better stop here.

~Hope everyone has a lovely evening!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

~a whole bunch of nothing~

~I finally have email, PC and a phone at work, however the phone is in my office and to use a computer or email I have to walk across the building to a temporary cube. We have been waiting for the 'port' to be turned on in my office so the computer will work. Looks like tomorrow I will have everything in one place. Finally!!

~Boy, I feel sort of bad if I do end up leaving there for a job @ UT (if they call me) after all the hassle in getting things set up...eeks! At least it'll be set for whoever they bring in after me.

~I was supossed to work at SB tonight but I luckily got someone to cover my shift...closing 3 nights in a row is just too much, especially now that I'm not @ home all day. Yesterday I went literally from one job to the other, no stop @ home in between. Ick! I was SO uncomfortable working last night too.

~I have an OB appt tomorrow morning and plan to have her sign off on my short term disability/maternity leave paperwork for SB. I have to give a 2 week notice so I'll still have a few days to work there, but I will likely give away a lot of my hours -it's just too uncomfortable to be there now....which is a bummer because I don't dread it like I used to a few months ago.

~Christmas is almost here and I'm SO NOT in the mood. I just didn't get the "Christmas bug" this year...let's see...maybe it could be due to the falling out with my aunt (on-going since July), OR the job loss/change & ensuing stressors OR hormones OR a husband that annoys the shit out of me more often than he should...gee, pick one...I think they all qualify for reasons why I don't feel festive.

~I wasn't going to buy any presents due to the job scenario, but then I started to feel guilty and so I caved, although I have scaled back tremendously. Even though I'm working, I will not get my 1st check 'til mid-January (totally sucks). I have never been this 'behind the 8-ball' when it comes to Christmas shopping...oh well. I bought my 1st present yesterday and a few more tonight, but haven't wrapped a thing. I usually enjoy wrapping my gifts, but I'm sort of dreading it this year...it just doesn't feel like Christmas time to me...at.all.

~Back to work issues...the place I work now is actually closing down from Dec 24 thru Jan 2nd...I have expressed need/interest in working over the holidays since I won't get paid. I certainly cannot afford a 2 week vacation right now - especially since I wouldn't be going anywhere. I'm still unsure if I'm going to be able to work or not but they better freakin' let me know ASAP - like tomorrow! I'm a planner and I need to know. It would not be cool if I cannot work during the break, nor would it make sense...they wanted me to start right away and then asked me if I could work more than 8 hrs/day - which so far, I haven't needed to...so all this rushing around and then I'd possibly be off for 2 wks...makes NO sense.

~If I don't end up working the day job over the holidays...guess where I'll end up putting in a ridiculous amount of hours???? Oh joy - lucky me. Is that regular or decaf?

~I swear just when I start feeling a little bit better about 'things', something always seems to get me down. I often find myself wishing I could go back a year (or more) in time...I would do A LOT OF THINGS DIFFERENT.

Monday, December 17, 2007

~sigh~

~6 days into the new job and I still have NO computer access or company email account. I basically cannot do ANYTHING w/o these 2 items. I sat there and looked at the walls just about all day...doesn't matter that I'm getting paid to do NOTHING - I cannot stand being so bored.

~I just got a phone in my office today.

~My office was about 60 degrees when I got there this morning. I had my coat on until lunch time...how ridiculous is that?!? Someone loaned me their space heater, which was somewhat helpful but it wasn't 'til the afternoon that the climate was tolerable. I sure hope it's not like that tomorrow...but I'm thinking that it might be. Oh joy!

~I can't stop thinking about the UT job...I really, really, really want it. Is it Thursday yet? I hope I hear from them by then.

~As much as I was looking forward to working in an office -around other people- I must admit that I'd much rather sleep 'til 8am instead of getting up at 6:30am. I also dread those first 10 minutes out of the shower - you know - when you are freezing to death...ugh...I hate that. Wearing my PJs to work was a nice perk too. Did I mention the 2 school zones I have to go thru on my commute too...ugh.

~So maybe being occasionally lonely working from home wasn't such a bad thing. *sigh*

Saturday, December 15, 2007

~it's official~

~I'm retaining water.

~My feet are SOOOO swollen.

~I have no ankles

~It's NOT attractive (at all)

Friday, December 14, 2007

~i'm back~

~Got home at 12:30am after two miserable flights from Ohio. Up at 6am today to go into the office. I'm exhausted.

~The training went well and despite the icky weather up there, all was good. Everyone was very nice, my hotel was cozy and I was near TONS of shopping (danger!). The Archiver's was about 1 mile from my hotel.

~Just to point out...the lady I spent all week with couldn't really tell I was PG 'til Wed when I wore a shirt that truly accentuates the belly. Another gal told me that I'm 'small' for being 32 weeks...so now you know why I kept saying they didn't notice...you can't tell so much depending on what I wear. They probably just thought I was FAT!

~My thing when I go out of town is to eat @ places that I don't have back home, so the minute I saw Chipotle, I was THERE!!! Yum!! I SO miss it. I had dinner at "Max & Erma's" the next night. We had them up in Michigan and I loved eating there - especially the cheese skewers - and I never order fried cheese anywhere else....there's just something about it @ Max & Erma's...so good!!

~From the info I collected up in OH and the fact that the office here was recently 'acquired' - it's going to be a rocky road for me for a while...not sure how I feel about that right now.

~All those calls from UT and the anticipation of an offer actually resulted in a request for a 2nd interview. Today @ 4pm I met with the head honcho of the Employment department and then met with 5 people, who would be peers should I get hired...I should hear something mid to late next week.

~Weekend plans: working at SB both Sat & Sun, although I'm looking for someone to pick up my Sunday shift. I just need a day off!!

~Yeah, so I totally need a new banner...sorry, I don't have a festive picture...I'll have to come up with something.

Monday, December 10, 2007

~nerves~

~I'm off to the airport shortly.

~I'm feeling a bit nervous, since they don't know I'm PG.

~I'm also feeling slightly decietful, since I didn't tell them (although there was no obligation to do so).

~I think I'll be really nervous tomorrow at 8am...wish me luck!

~Friday Fun - even though it's Monday~

Swiped this from Dawn...

Friday Fun: The Four Edition

What are…

1. the last 4 books you have read? Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, Harry Potter #7, Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen, Shopaholic Takes Manhattan by Sophie Kinsella.

2. the last 4 websites you have visited? Bloglines. Blogger. Good Reads. Yahoo.

3. 4 favorite items of clothing? Pajamas. Socks. Anything NOT maternity related. :-)

4. 4 favorite things to eat? Ice Cream. Chick-fil-A. Crab Legs. Enchiladas.

5. 4 favorite movies? Love Actually. Hook. Elf. 40 Year Old Virgin.

6. 4 favorite books? P.S. I Love You (movie coming out 12/21...hooray). Love, Rosie. Harry Potter books.

7. 4 favorite TV shows? Grey's Anatomy. Private Practice. Project Runway. House.

8. 4 things you ate yesterday? Cherry Vanilla Ice Cream. Special K w/berries. Banana. Salad.

9. 4 things you need to do today? Drug Test (done). Pack. Drive to Airport. Get on plane.

10. 4 gifts you want during the holiday season? Since I haven't felt very festive this year, I haven't put much thought into what I want...typically though I like to ask for more practical gifts as opposed to 'fun stuff'. Example: I hate buying my toothbrush refills cuz they cost $20 for only three of them. I love getting them for Christmas...hee hee.

I usually find a book or 3 to ask for, but there's only one I can think of right now and it's not a priority because I still have 9 others on my nightstand waiting to be read.

Saturday, December 08, 2007

~pondering thoughts~

It's been an interesting week....a couple of interviews @ a couple different places and a job offer. I'm off to OH on Monday, after a mini-shopping spree for 'office-acceptable' maternity clothes tomorrow after my shift at SB.

As I mentioned, the job is a 6 month contract position as a recruiter. This could mean that I'm looking for something else in 6 months or it could also go permanent...but do I want to wait 6 months to become an 'employee'?? It's been a long 3+ years w/o benefits, paid time off etc and I have come to REALLY value (and long for) these things...we often take them for granted when we have them. Let me just say that not getting paid for Christmas Day, Thanksgiving Day, 4th of July, Labor Day etc. really stinks...it makes the holidays a little less enjoyable.

Anyway...all that to say that I interviewed on Tuesday @ the university, also for a recruiting job, but it also had a number of other 'duties' along with it that I would really enjoy, unlike where the other job is solely recruiting.

The university folks said they would take 1-2 wks to decide and that they won't be hiring ;til Jan 2008, which is part of the reason that I accepted this other position, not to mention that I need a job sooner rather than later. The funniest part of this is that I actually applied for this position way back in JULY!!! I must have had a bad week @ Pepsi (not unusual) and decided to see what else was out there. It only took them 6 months to finally start the interview process...geez.

What I'm getting at is I have been informed that the university has already called 2 of my references...mmmm...they don't usually do that unless they are interested in you. I'm more curious than ever to see if I end up with an offer from them...then comes the difficult decision....here's why:

UT Job
*mediocre salary
*health bennies
*free tuition
*8-10 mile commute
*permanent full time

Recruiter Job
*very generous salary
*no bennies
*n/a
*16 mile commute
*temporary contract

I guess when I write it out, it looks like an easy decision, however I am pretty sure that the differences in salary will be quite significant, so it basically boils down to that. I'm just hoping that if I get an offer from UT, that it's not SOOOO low that I cannot even consider it.

I really think I'd enjoy the UT job more. The work was much more appealing to me, the interview was enjoyable and everyone knows that it's fun to work @ a university, not to mention the wonderful benefits.

*sigh*

I'm going to try not to think much about this, since it hasn't really happened yet...but I do think it's quite odd that they've contacted 2 of my references only 2 days after the interview.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

~yay~

~I got the job!!!

~I don't think the lady noticed that I was PG @ the interview yesterday.

~I fly to Ohio on Monday.

~I hope they don't freak out when they realize I'm PG.

~I feel sort of deceitful, but then, they aren't supposed to discriminate on pregnancy. I think if I would have told them, I would have been shooting myself in the foot....like with the last lady I told.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

~nervous~

~getting nervous
~going for face to face interview @ 1pm today after yesterday's 2:30pm phone interview
~they are moving fast, want to have me start on Mon or Tues next week if all goes well
~they do not know I'm PG
~let's hope the belly doesn't ruin the opportunity for me
~I NEED this job

~I'm also interested in the university job, but they won't make a decision for 1-2 wks and not hire 'til Jan '08.

Monday, December 03, 2007

~just an update~

~My friend KELLY was here for the weekend from NJ. We had a great time and it was SOOOO nice to see her. We walked all around Gatlinburg on Saturday, then went out to dinner w/a stop at Babies R Us on the way, where she so kindly contributed to the baby room decor.

~I worked @ SB Sunday night from 5pm-11:30pm. Around 3pm I rec'd a txt msg from a co-worker asking if I wanted her Monday OPENING shift...I can definitely use the hours, so I couldn't see passing it up...I got 4 hrs of sleep last night and was back @ SB at 5am today. Whew!!! I was done @ 11am and came home to do a bunch of errands. I had planned to take a nap but was wrapped up in my errands. Finally I sat on the couch and fell asleep - bad idea - I feel more tired now than before. Ugh.

~Tonight is our last night of Childbirth class..thank goodness. While I feel it's helpful and VERY informative, it still freaks me out.

~I have an interview @ the university @ 10am tomorrow. It would be a good position. I hope it goes well, but I'm going into all interviews with NO expectations...that's the least harmful way to do it at this point.

~I also have a phone interview tomorrow @ 2:30pm for a contract recruiting job...

~Between interviews I'll go get the oil changed on my car (a bit overdue) and run an errand or two and then hang out at home. I need the rest.

~I work @ 6:15pm @ SB tomorrow night and just picked up another 4 hr shift on Thursday so that gives me about 34 hrs there this week....ouch...my feet hurt just thinking about it. :-)

Friday, November 30, 2007

~unprofessionalism overflow~

~Password still didn't work this morning

~Packed up the PC and it's ready to go (psycho mgr will be relieved, I'm sure)

~Agreement was to work THRU today, so I better get paid for it

~I'm truly shocked by the unprofessionalism

~I've never been treated like this

~Hoping the Karma Gods come thru for me on this one...

Thursday, November 29, 2007

~annoyed~

Yes, I've been miserable lately, but I think anyone would be annoyed by the following...

~the psycho beyotch of a manager has called me 3 times in 2 weeks, twice in the past 3 days.

~she hasn't even called me that many times since being the manager (about 6 months)

~today she has the nerve to ask me if there is anything I need to hand off to her or have I been working with the recruiters to do that?!?!
My answer: Duh!! Why in the hell would I not work w/the recruiters (as I've always done) simply to avoid communicating with her?

~then, the icing on the cake...she asks me if I'll be able to get the PC packed up and dropped off to be shipped out tomorrow or Saturday for Monday delivery.
My answer: I coldly respond that I'm not sure if I can get there Friday or not unless I sign off at 4pm because I have somewhere to be Friday evening. I surely would not be taking time on MY Saturday to do it either.

~Then she rudely tells me that 1/2 day Fridays start tomorrow so I don't need to work past 1pm. On one hand, that is great, on the other, not so much ($$$).

What irks me though is that she is so effin ridiculous. There is no way I would want to keep this piece o'crap computer anyway. It's uber slow and ancient. I have my OWN computer, I don't need this one and I don't appreciate being treated like a criminal.

Speaking of criminals...I'm not the one with 2 DUIs on my record...something I just happened to find out recently!!!!

~Oh and did I mention that all of a sudden my password is no longer working??? Nice.

~gradual~

I'm slowly getting better.

There is no more puking - thank goodness for that.

I do have a slightly sore throat though.

I did absolutely nothing yesterday (except work)...so I guess I mean I didn't shower, cook, clean or anything else. It was wonderful actually. All I did was eat & drink the approved items and lay in bed watching TV. I need MORE days like that.

Today I had to get up and shower asap. I had a scheduled interview on Tuesday, the day I was sick, so I had it rescheduled to this morning. It's at 9:30am.

I am then meeting my mom for lunch @ 1pm. Will probably only have soup, if that.

Then I have a 3pm phone interview today.

I also have to work at SB at 6:30pm tonight.

I feel sort of overwhelmed with so much to do after having nothing to do yesterday. I hope it doesn't backfire on me and make me feel worse tomorrow.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

~taking a beating~

Too much excitement here lately....

On Monday night I went to bed at 11pm and all was well.

At 11:15pm I was up and worshipping the porcelein god...all of a sudden....I do not know where this came from.

At 12:20am or so, it happened again.

At 1:30am or so, back to the bathroom for me again

This continued every hour ON THE HOUR until 6am.

I finally called the on-call doc who instructed me to come into the ER.

I spent 5 hours there yesterday, but miraculously was not dehydrated, but I sure was DYING for some water. I was sooooo thirsty.

Anyway, I received an anti-nausea pill and then finally was able to take in some liquids. After holding them down for 2 hours, I was released.

They never really diagnosed me there, but when I called my doctor at 4pm yesterday afternoon complaining of constant achy legs, they told me that I've probably got the Flu! Argh!

I got my Flu shot about 10 days ago. Apparently they do not offer protection until 4-6 wks afterwards. I did not know that. :-(

I was in bed just about the entire afternoon and fell asleep for the night at 8pm!!! Wow -that's early for me. I slept straight thru 'til 7am today.

I'm working this morning, but certainly not feeling 100%. Thankfully I got people to cover my shifts @ SB last night and tonight. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

~if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all~

I haven't posted in a while, hence the title...I'm sure everyone is sick of reading my negative and crappy-life posts and so I have not posted lately to spare you from reading a bunch of nothing. Basically, I have nothing 'good' to report right now so it's best if I don't say (or post) anything at all. Since all this junk is dominating my life, I'm surrounded by comments such as 'it'll get better' or 'you'll be fine' or 'other people have it worse than you' or 'everything happens for a reason' etc. Thanks to my handy-dandy Master's Counseling classes, have learned that those are all EMPTY responses that ultimately INVALIDATE a person's feelings and are not helpful in making someone feel better and so I will refrain from posting any job or life news at this time...

And so, in honor of the above paragraph...here are '50' questions that I swiped from Dawn's blog...except, there aren't really 50 because some people deleted some along the way...

1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
House payment - it's the biggest, it hurts the most.

2. Where was the last place you had a romantic dinner?
Ha - can't remember that.

4. If you could go back and change one thing what would it be ?
Oh. boy. (I'm keeping this response as it's what Dawn used and if I really answered this question, this would be the World's Longest Blog Post EVER!)

5. Name of your first grade teacher?
Cannot remember...WAY TOO LONG AGO.

8. How many colleges have you attended? 4

9. Why did you choose the shirt that you have on right now?
Because it was time for bed and I put on my pajamas...too bad I cannot sleep and have to be up in 3.5 hrs to go to work.

11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would it be?
A quiet & remote beach. I'd take Milo & Hula ONLY!


12. First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
"Oh crap, it's 3:45am already?"


13. Last thought before going to sleep last night?
"it's 8:30pm and I must go to bed NOW because I have to be up at 3:45am"

14. Do you miss being a child?
Oh do I ever!!! My childhood was WAY better than my adult life has been.

16. What errand/chore do you despise?
errand: grocery shopping. chore: cleaning the bathrooms

17. If you didn't have to work, would you volunteer?
if i could find the right volunteer position. or I would work for fun. (keeping Dawn's answer here too).

18. Get up early or sleep in?
depends on day of the week

19. What is your favorite cartoon character?
I don't think I have one anymore.

20. Favorite thing to do at night with a girl/guy?
depends on who the guy is - LOL

21. Have you found real love yet? pleading the 5th

22. When did you first start feeling old? 2 yrs ago

25. What do you get every time you go into Wal-Mart?
Groceries!

26. Beach or lake?
Beach

27. Do you think marriage is an outdated ritual?
In terms of what it was intended to be, probably so. Rare is the couple that truly works and works to hang on to a struggling marriage...it's so easy to 'just get out' nowadays.

28. Do you own property?
I wouldn't say 'own', but I do have a mortgage and my house sits on land, so I think technically the answer would be 'yes' - but since I've only made 9 payments, I probably only own 1-2 blades of grass.

29. Favorite Guilty pleasure?
Travel....just about anywhere.

30. Favorite movie you wouldn't want anyone to find out about?
no idea

31. What's your drink?
Diet Sunkist

34. Who from high school would you like to run in to?
No one

38. Worst relationship mistake that you wish you could take back?
Giving a 2nd chance to people that I shouldn't have.

40. What famous person would you like to have dinner with?
how long have you been reading this blog? you should know the answer to this is: Robin Williams

41. Indoors or Outdoors?
Indoors if it's cold outside. Outside if it's 75 or higher.

42. Have you ever crashed your vehicle?
I've been in my share of car accidents

44. Last book you read?
Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

46. Strangest place you have ever brushed your teeth?
~I dunno~

48. Do you go to church?
Not very often these days

49. At this point in your life would you rather start a new career or a new relationship? Ha...great timing...a new career would be nice!

50. How old are you...36

Sunday, November 18, 2007

~making room for baby~

~We picked up the baby furniture on Friday and started assembling the crib last night.

~I think I've been in denial about the amount of space in the room, but I've finally come to terms with the fact that I'm going to have to sell my beloved chair & a half (pictured here).

~I may need a chair in there, but this one is just too big. :-(

~O will move the dresser in (from the garage) today while I'm working @ SB so I've started washing baby clothes so that I can put them away in the dresser.

~Slowly but surely, things are coming together in there.

Friday, November 16, 2007

~life continues to suck~

~interview lady finally called this morning @ 9:40am

~she didn't sound 'under the weather'

~they are moving forward with an 'internal' person

~eventually they'll build to 4 recruiters (2 more to fill)

~so she wants to stay in touch and possibly bring me in for one of the other positions

~that could be months down the road

~certainly doesn't help me out right now

~she asked me "how does that sound to you?"

~how do I answer that? "it sounds like crap to me, I need a job now, not 4 months down the road"

~I didn't say that, although I wanted to.

~Now try and tell me that being PREGNANT had NOTHING to do with this decision...I think NOT!!! I'm not an idiot!! (that's what I get for being honest and forthright)

~Looks like I'll be working 40 hrs/wk at Starbucks come 12/3...yep, cuz that's why I went to college.

~public service announcement~

Found these at Walgreen's last night!! We don't have to wait 'til Easter anymore...hooray!! I know Emily will be happy to hear this news.


Thursday, November 15, 2007

~totally random~

Here's a totally random post and my attempt at being 'positive' when in reality I feel like complete crap and would like to just disappear forever!!

~I could eat toaster waffles everyday...I was reminded how good they are when I had them for breakfast today.

~I applied for a job today with Nielson Media...lots of great benefits, too much driving but they provide a company car, they want someone bilingual, could be interesting...we'll see what happens.

~My dad is coming in town today to have lunch and take me to Babies R Us. :-)

~Hands down....this has been the crappiest year of my life...I sure hope 2008 is better. (ok, so that wasn't too positive)

~I do not have to work at SB tonight...finally can watch Grey's LIVE instead of via DVR.

~It's really something when people know you are leaving a job, they start being even more rude to you than they originally were. WTF?

~I feel a strong urge to send a scathing email to a couple people in a couple wks...we'll see. I feel the need to speak my mind in this situation.

~Project Runway debuted last night - wahoo - I stayed up 'til 1am so I could watch it...looks like another great season in store.

~I'm still waiting to hear from the lady regarding rescheduling the interview that was supposed to happen yesterday...getting quite discouraged at this point.

~This week is dragging by.

~A friend of mine is trying to get me free diapers and formula via her mom, who is an OB...that would be SO awesome. I don't want to use formula, but if I'm not working @ home, it'll be difficult to do 100% boob juice.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

~interview update~

~I finally received an email from the lady @ 7pm last night (I was at SB). She was out sick and said it was likely she would be out Wed too.

~We are trying to reschedule for Friday.

~I am waiting to hear back from her.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

~ball of emotions~

That's me today -a ball of emotions...I can't even decide WHICH emotion either. Warning: this posted ended up being quite whiney....(I'm blaming it on hormones).

We had Session #2 of the Childbirth class last night. The entire 2 hours was spent reviewing the vaginal birth and watching 2 videos: one on the birth and the other on comfort positions during labor. If I wasn't dreading the pain before, I certainly am now. The only funny part was that during the Transition stage of labor (3rd stage), our book says "mother may experience extreme love & hate emotions towards father" - Ha!! I'm sure I'll be cussing O out during the entire stage (if not longer). Did you know that the average labor lasts 17 hours?

Today I had a doc appt...I had the glucose/gestational diabetes test. This involves consuming a bottle of orange syrup-like liquid and then waiting 1 hour for them to take my blood. Here's hoping it comes back OK, otherwise I will have to go back for the 3 hour version of this test. Just the thought of that depressed me.

I made my next appointment. I have to go every 2 wks now. This sort of depressed me too. I wouldn't mind if I was still going to be working from home, or at least working. Going there every 2 wks is going to be a huge inconvenience if I'm working elsewhere...lost hours, lost wages, mileage, etc.

I am (supposed) to have that interview tomorrow morning at 10am. When I spoke w/the lady last Thursday, she said she would follow up by sending me an email with the interview location. I have not rec'd the email yet. There are 2 offices in the particular town she mentioned. I decided to call there today to find out which location. I was able to leave her a voicemail and asked her to confirm the location for me. This was 3 hrs ago and I have not heard back. What if she doesn't call? Do I just show up? I feel like I've been left hanging. Again, this makes me feel really depressed. What if it doesn't pan out?

I have not had any other promising job prospects. I've applied for a few more positions, but the job market here sucks...unless I want to be a Pastor...there are TONS of jobs for Pastors considering I live in the Bible Belt.

I'm also disappointed that I have to remain working at SB indefinitely. Bending over is quite uncomfortable now and being on my feet is no picnic either. I've been really short of breath lately too. I think today I came crashing down from that orange glucose loaded drink because I am sooooooo tired...I took 2 cat naps on the couch, but had to get up when the phone rang.

People have asked me if I can pick up more hours @ SB in the event I don't land another job...well, the answer is "yes" and "no". Everyone is part-time there except the manager. I normally get scheduled for about 25 hrs. I managed to pick up extra hours a couple wks ago, but there's no guarantee of that happening every week and even if it did, the money would not come close to making up for the difference I'm losing from the day job.

Did I mention what a loser I feel like now being in a position where I HAVE TO WORK at Starbucks? My self confidence is in the gutter. It's one thing WANTING TO work there vs. HAVING TO WORK THERE. Two months ago I thought I would be starting my Maternity Leave from there about now.

Considering how tired I am now really bums me out if I end up working outside the home over the next two months. I feel like that's going to be really difficult. I'm anticipating being quite miserable. Then there's the financial piece...I'll have to go buy more maternity clothes for work.

On a daily basis, I find myself worrying about daycare costs, something I wasn't going to need before.

It's pretty hard to be excited about what's to come considering all the crap going on right now. I feel like there is no relief in sight.

Monday, November 12, 2007

~great gift idea~


Here's a great holiday, birthday or "just because" gift idea....create your OWN Starbuck's gift card. There are a bunch of designs and options to choose from - they are so cute and can be so fun to create.

It's as easy as 1-2-3!

Step 1: Go on-line to create your card
Step 2: Receive your newly created card in the mail
Step 3: Enjoy your favorite SB drink.

~baby shower~

My baby shower was held Sunday @ 2pm. It was a lot of fun and loved especially by me because it was "short & sweet".

We played that fun game of tasting baby food and guessing the flavors...I LOVE BABY FOOD CORN!! Yum!! LOL!!


I got lots of good stuff, cute clothes, lots of socks, blankets, books and the bedding that I registered for.

Unfortunately, there is still a TON of stuff that I need!!

Friday, November 09, 2007

~good news & a brain teaser~

I received a call yesterday for an interview. The job sounds promising and the salary range is in-line with what I make now, which surprised me since wages aren't too good in this area.

It was a very positive phone interview and I'm looking forward to meeting her on Wednesday. Now I just need to find some "interview-appropriate" clothing....

They sent me an on-line "test" and here are a couple of the questions that were included. I could not figure these two out for the life of me....give them a try and let me know what you come up with.

What should be the next number in the series?

60 30 20 15 12

Here's another...

23:3983 as 32: ______

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

~bad, bad, bad, bad news~

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse...

I have been working "contract" for the past 3 years...it was only a matter of time.

I received THE call today.

My contract is ending on 11/30.

They "claim" they need to bring my position "in-house" to support more projects in 2008. Since it's Corporate America, it's probably a lie, but whatever.

I was initially only given 'til 11/21 (a whole 10 work days, how generous of them), but I asked for more time than that and got a whole extra week.

When my manager (whom I've NEVER met in person) said "you can stay on 'til Thanksgiving, that is, if you want to work". (Yeah, cuz I'm a closet-millionaire and really don't need this job) I said that I (really) need to work as long as possible (and asked to stay on 'til year end) as well as mentioned the small fact that I am 7 MONTHS PREGNANT. She didn't say a word, in one ear, out the other...no surprise to me really.

The response to my request to work til 12/31 was an emphatic "NO"...she didn't even hesitate.

I have always thought that the lowest, crappiest, sleeziest thing a company could do is to let someone go right before the holidays...I just don't get it. That goes beyond lack of compassion. It's a slap in the face. Companies want employees to be loyal and when they are, this is what they get in return. How nice!

I think I just lost my appetite for Thanksgiving and I don't foresee any Christmas shopping in my future...I think I'll just sleep through Dec 25th.

Did I mention that I'm the breadwinner in the house right now?

Going into an interview with my fat-ass stomach sticking out isn't going to go over too well either. As soon as they see me, they'll either bust a gut laughing or tell me that the interviewer has had a conflict come up and we'll have to reschedule.

I'm screwed!!

Oh and I've already heard "everything happens for a reason", "when one door closes, another opens", "God only gives us as much as we can handle" etc. etc. I don't really buy into any of these, nor are they helpful.

It's just me and my kleenex right now.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

~i won!~

Wow! I won a recent scrapbook layout contest that I entered...I'm surprised. I really didn't expect to win. What a pleasant surprise.

You can see it
here.

Monday, November 05, 2007

~survey time~

I swiped this survey from Dawn's blog...not much going on that's blogworthy so this came @ the perfect time...

Yourself: expanding with every minute

Your partner: 1 husband, he's at work.

Your hair: short, light brown with blonde highlights.

Your mother: is awesome. We look alike, we sound alike and we have fun when we are together.

Your father: is awesome too. Very caring and concerned - he rocks!

Your favorite item: If my cats cannot count as an "item", then I guess it would have to be my bed...I'm really sleepy right now and would like to be one with my bed.

Your dream last night: something to do with Starbuck's. Clearly, I've been working too many hours there this past week.

Your favorite drink: diet sunkist

Your dream car: my regular readers could probably answer this for me...but just in case, it's a Jeep Wrangler, Full Steel Doors, Soft Top, preferably navy blue with a black top...just like the one I used to have.

Dream home: on a beach, where I can literally walk out onto the beach or sit on my porch and see the beach, smell the ocean air and there's no risk of hurricanes or the house getting washed away.

The room you are in: my office/newly converted guest room.

Your Fear: the future

Where you want to be in 10 years: I can't think this far ahead right now, I am a planner, but I don't plan *that* far ahead.

Who you hung out with last night: a few fellow Starbuck's employees (at work)

You’re not: working tonight (miracle!)...I have to go to birthing class instead.

One of your wish list items: a nice wooden privacy fence would be nice.

The last thing you did: got my car washed on my lunch hour

You are wearing: blue jeans (that fall down when I walk because they are ELASTIC/STRETCH) , long sleeve white tee w/orange polo on top.

Your favorite weather: Late Spring and Early Fall

Your favorite book: "P.S. I love you by Cecelia Ahearn.

Your life: exhausting recently.

Your mood: suspicious

Your best friend: I think I have a few GOOD friends, but I don't think I have a real best friend anymore. *sigh*

What are you thinking about right now: too many things to list here.

Your car: 2005 Ford Escape

What are you doing at the moment: answering this survey

Relationship status: uh, married.

When is the last time you laughed: maybe at work yesterday, but I cannot recall exactly why.

Play along if you like...

Sunday, November 04, 2007

~baby overload~

It's been a baby-packed weekend...O installed some extra shelves in the closet which will help me keep things organized.
We picked up the paint today and O got 1/2 the room painted - we are painting the room a Sage green to coordinate w/the bedding I choose. The yellow is the old color that was on the walls.


This is the furniture that I picked out and purchased last week. Hopefully it comes in this week. I really want to have the dresser before my shower next Sunday so that I can put everything away...I'm all about organization. These are just pics of the crib and changing table, there's also a dresser.





Thursday, November 01, 2007

~one word~

Nothing to blog about...got this from Dawn.

The Air: cool
Favorite Fall Indulgence: sweaters
Out Your Window: grass
On Your Desk: phone
On Your Feet: socks
Favorite Fall Smell: bonfires
Temperature On Your Thermostat: 70
Your Shirt: yellow
Your Hair: disaster
Something You Want to Make Sure You Do this Fall: sleep
Where You Last Took a Fall (heh): church
Your Last Drink: agua
Your Last Meal: soup
You're Thinking About: crying
Hearing: blabber
Your Favorite Fall Color: orange
Your Take On Seasonal Novelty Flags (i.e. turkeys, pumpkins, scarecrows): blech
A New Fall Show You Like: Journeyman
Your Plans for the Evening: Work
Your Relationship With Pumpkins: yum

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

~potential travel?~

I rec'd an email this morning from the new dept manager.

There is finally a (tentative) plan to bring everyone together for an off-site meeting of some sort.

This would take place in Dallas.

I've been working remotely from TN for 2 yrs & 3 months now w/o a company-paid trip back there. In addition, there is only 1 person on the current team who was actually there when I was located there...talk about turnover...

It would be my crap luck that this trip would be planned during my journey down "let's get fat" road. I can only imagine the snugness I will feel in those ultra comfy airplane seats too.

This means I need to buy MORE *&^%$# maternity clothes as I do not have anything that would really work for the office.

I can't help but to be opposed to spending even MORE $$ on clothes that will be worn only 1-2 times (if that). I may even leave the tags on and return them when I get back...I've never done that, but there's a first time for everything.

And since the "falling out" with my aunt, I will not be notifying her of my upcoming trip and will let the company fork out the dough for a comfy hotel room for me instead of staying with her. I'll sleep much better in a hotel room anyway.

We'll see if this pans out...it is 4th quarter after all and who the heck spends money in the 4th quarter??

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

~i'm bored~

Tuesday morning - I'm bored.

I already did my treadmill walking and showered.

I'm also working, but still bored.

Of the 20+ blogs I read, NO ONE HAS UPDATED!!!! WTH? I need something to read!! Also, since hardly anyone visits my blog, I rarely even have comments to read either. *sigh*

If I had the discipline, I'd turn off the TV and read "Eat, Love, Pray" so I can finally finish it.

It got COLD here overnight...it was 70-80 over the weekend and right this minute it is 44 out there!!

I love Fall weather, but I am really sad that I cannot wear all my sweaters. I just love the feeling of getting all bundled up in them every year. I have bought 3 "fat mama" aka "maternity" sweaters and hopefully they get me thru the winter. LOL!

Is it 12:30pm yet? I'm meeting a friend for lunch.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

~what weekend?~

Was there a weekend in there somewhere? I must have missed it.

I worked 14 hrs combined Sat & Sun, so I guess that's the problem. I need to accumulate some extra hours right now because I'll be off on some upcoming weekends.

I have a question...when friends ask how you are doing, do you generally answer with the truth, albeit negative or positive, or do you find that you always respond that all is wonderful because maybe people don't really want to know the truth if everything wasn't completely wonderful??? (hope I didn't lose you in that uber-long sentence)

The reason I ask is because I'm a bit frustrated w/a friend who's been emailing me over the past few months and asks specifics about things in my life...I state the facts and I sort of feel "attacked" by her responses. I guess I'm just going to have to say that everything is wonderful...even when/if it isn't.

If you can't be honest with friends, then what the heck are they for? Did I miss something somewhere? I'm always open and willing to hearing good & bad from my friends!! *huge sigh*