my life, these days, revolves around back pain and little else.
it's sad and yet amazing how back pain can control every single thing you do.
the 3rd injection was less than successful.
i've gone for a 2nd opinion. the news was not good.
there is only 1 thing left to be done before surgery - an RF ablation AKA burning the nerves that send the pain signals to my brain. sounds awesome huh?
i'm NOT at all willing to do surgery at this point...despite the insane level of pain i've been experiencing lately. (this weekend was near torture)
the surgeon told me the surgery would include screws and rods in my back! what?
i'm 46 yrs old. i can't believe i'm in need of such a procedure.
i'm beyond depressed about this and am wondering when/where the full blown melt down will occur.
i think it almost occured this morning when i put a top on that i hadn't worn since last summer...and it's much tighter than it was. the weight gain piece of all of this has me completely devastated.
i worked SO hard to lose weight and do as much running as I did last year...and now, its all for nothing. i'm up 10-12lbs.
we had biometric screenings at work last week & I already got my results. of course they are much worse than last year. as if that's a surprise.
this may be extreme, but i do feel like "nothing" is going right for me these days.
i can barely stand up in the kitchen long enough to do the dishes or bake some brownies.
should i be thankful i do not have a job that forces me to stand for long lengths of time? ugh.