Sunday, October 11, 2009

child care drama

~warning! this may be a lengthy pull up a chair or come back later when you have time to read....or I guess you could choose not to read at all...anyway, that's your warning.

~as the title implies...this will focus around my newly developed child care issues.

~things had been going well until about 3 weeks ago.

~background: a lady comes to my house 3 days per week to watch Ethan. I only need 3 days of care right now, so it works perfectly. Her son and husband work with O and she doesn't drive so they drop her off in the morning on their way to work. Seemed to be working well.

~3 weeks ago she called to ask if she could bring another kid with her. apparently she has watched this kid before & all of a sudden (!) his parents didn't have anyone to watch him. My other choice was to take Ethan to her house and well there's no way that was happening because (1) our agreement was child care at OUR home (2) she lives 30 minutes away (3) she lives in "the hood"...i've been there. it's nasty. nuff said.

~her youngest child (8 years old) is in year-round school so he was going to be coming with her as well for the past 3 weeks while on his break. that's fine. he has come before. no issues.

~well, with the other kid...there were issues. he is a couple months older than E and initially I thought it would be great that E would have a playmate. I also understood this to be ONLY this ONE week. things quickly went E would not nap during the day. The first day he finally gave in at 4:30pm and we had to wake him at 6pm so that he would sleep at night for me. The 2nd day, she neglected to mention that he didn't nap AT ALL and so he crashed at 5:05pm - the minute they walked out the door.

~on that Thursday (her last work day w/us for the week), I asked if they were ALL coming back on Tuesday and she replied that they would. That is when I began to further inquire about this other kid and how much longer he would be coming. She said she did not know if the parents were looking for alternative arrangements. She had been planning to bring him indefinitely...

~the following day (Friday) I called my sitter to inform her that I could not have her bringing this other kid to MY house indefinitely for the following reasons; (1) liability!!! if something were to happen to him at MY house, I'd be screwed (2) this was not our arrangement, we agreed to 1:1 care for Ethan and I did not feel he was receiving the same quality care and (3) Ethan is not napping. Also, in my opinion, she was technically 'double-dipping' getting paid by both us and the other kids mom...essentially running a day-care at MY home & I wasn't profiting at fact, it was costing me more in juice, wipes, food...etc.

~Because I realize the difficulty in finding child care, I told her she could bring the kid for the following 2 weeks while her kid was also out of school, but after that I could not allow him. She would need to inform the parents. She seemed to be fine with that.

~This past week was the end of week 3.

~Guess who called me last night (Sat) to say that she has no one to take her 8 yr old to the bus stop & therefore cannot come watch Ethan?!?!?! Initially I felt she was being sincere & not making this shit up but the more I think about it, it's just a bit too coincidental for me and I think she's a big freakin' liar.

~just like when there were 5 dirty sippy cups @ the end of the day & she said the other kid wasn't using E's cups. Yeah...I was also born yesterday.

~Anyway, I would bet a pretty penny that the mom of the other little kid is paying her more than we are (since we only need 3 days & she needs 5) to watch her son & it's a better deal for my sitter because now she can stay home & get paid more to watch this little rugrat.

~I'm livid!!

~I usually don't enjoy confrontation, but believe me when I say I am pretty damn close to picking up the phone & going nutso on her....the only reason I'm not is that I have NO proof...but then again it's awfully coincidental to me.

~What infuriates me most is the lack of courtesy to give me some notice...if she doesn't want to watch E and would rather watch this other kid at her home, that is her right, but be professional and have some effin courtesy.

~Now for the fun part. O is in a position of power at work over the sitter's son & husband. They pretty much have a job because of O. He has gone to bat for them. He translates for them. Etc. There have been numerous layoffs at O's company and he has pretty much saved their a$$ since they are watching Ethan.

~The shit is about to hit the fan.

~If they want to screw with us...I'm thinking they'll be awfully sorry in the end. Not that O or I will do anything intentionally, but O has been complaining about the extreme laziness of the two of them for quite a while and well, I don't think he's going to be willing to cover for them anymore.

~We can play this game too.

~So now on Monday afternoon, O and I will go up to the daycare so he can see it. Mom and I went on Friday and I am pleased with it. The biggest negative though is they only do Full Time care and we don't need Full Time right now, although we will in January.

~I have this week of care covered between my mom and me taking Thursday off, but it seems that E may start daycare the following week as opposed to in January.

~The biggest drawback for us of course is paying ALOT more for a service that we don't fully need right now. I wouldn't mind finding a PT job but who in the heck is going to hire me on Mondays and Fridays only....nuff said.

~Oh and if you think I'm mad about should see O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Beth said...

First, your sitter is rude and it looks like she is trying to take advantage of the situation. Second, the full time care may provide you with a little more time for you to do your school work.

I feel for you. It is no fun having someone lie to you.

K13 said...

Beth-yes. she's very rude. I will likely use that extra time to do school work, but it's hard to focus on a positive such as that when it's going to hit hard in the pocketbook. Ugh! E will love it though - he seemed to enjoy it when we went to visit on Friday.

Anonymous said...

Good luck.

I won't want somebody watching extra kids in my house either.

emilysuze said...

What a crazy situation! I can't believe that she felt it was okay to bring another child to your house indefinitely and then to give you no warning! What crap. I agree with another comment that maybe this full time care will allow you more time to work on school work even though it is more of an expense. Sorry about the craziness. :(

omchelsea said...

Thats such a bummer and terribly unfair; I hope it works out at the new place :)

Anonymous said...

People are just rude. But you are so right about the liability issue.

Does the new daycare do sharing at all? Like, is there another parent who only needs it part-time right now, so you could go in together for a part-time slot or something?

Optimistic Pessimist said...

Child care situations are the worst. I had major sitter drama when my son was two and ended up sending him to daycare. I was really weary and nervous, but he ended up really liking it and it did a world of good for him.

I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but perhaps there will be a silver lining...

JW.BW said...

Well, that sucks. But atleast you have some extra time if E doesnt like the new daycare place before you need it full time in January incase you want to switch.

good luck with all that girl. that just sucks!!

Two Flights Down said...

I agree with everyone that it is just rude for the sitter to even think it's okay to bring another kid into your home, and then just assume it would be okay to do it indefinitely.

She needs to be upfront with you all. If she's going to stick with watching this other kid, the least she could do was show a little respect for you and let you know straight up what's going on so you know for sure if your arrangements need changed.

Very unprofessional. And rude.

em said...

personally i're better off without her. granted that thought doesn't help the current situation...but still. ugh. what a pain.

Rachel said...

That sounds so shady! There's no reason that they should do that to you! :(

I hope it all works out for you and e!

~**Dawn**~ said...

You know my feelings on this situation. She's a real piece of work.

Valerie said...

I cannot believe her! I can't believe the lies! Yowsers. That's one thing that bugs me. I'm so sorry she's pulling all this, but maybe it's for the better. You're way better off without her. Who knows what she would come up with later on.